Friday, May 12, 2006

You can't spell 'miserably' without 'Yale'

Get me the fuck out of here. Gradschool sucks. (I wrote this 5 wks ago when i was extremely down. Now i'm just (extremely-2) down).

I had this about half done (and all hysterical) when linux decided to freak out. DAMMIT!

I'll try to do it again, but as we all know, you cannot manufacture inspirado.

I found this nugget in an NBC Sports article about the US World Cup Team:

After four years of painstaking preparation, after an opening flop and a valiant tie, the Americans must beat Ghana on Thursday and get some help to advance to the World Cup’s second round. Boom or bust? That will be answered Thursday in an eight-sided stadium in Bavaria made famous by Hitler Youth marches.

Apparently the Nazis came up with Ultimate Fighting....who knew?

Lemme guess. You're from a red state, aren't you?

Today's useless fact. The 25 most used nouns in the English language are:

time, person, year, way, day, thing, man, world, life, hand, part, child, eye, woman, place, work, week, case, point, government, company, number, group, problem, fact

Someone should come up with a sentence or short paragraph using all of these words. Sounds like something you'd do in the second grade....I'll try in a little while.

"Can you kill me again? For the love of Allah, please!"

And I thought god hated men romping around in tights.

One step down from abstinance....think about it.

For people who telecommute, you'd think they wouldn't care that much.

Just more proof that there isn't a god.

"Storytelling can wait until religious education lessons."

Apparently there's an overarching 'god' theme today. He must be trying to stir up his own excitement now that 24 is over for the season.

Today is the 'Chemistry Picnic'. Think summer corporate outing but a lot nerdier. A lot. At least that's something to look forward to and will eat up a good portion of the day. No one is in my lab right now. They either haven't come in yet or god knows where smoking a cigarette and reading the paper or watching the World Cup.

Not that i'm doing anything of note. I, like normal, am sitting and waiting for my boss to decide to email me back with whatever other random, useless task i need to do. The one rule of graduate school is 'just do what you're told'. You have the entire rest of your life to have original thoughts. Why blow them all now?

I guess there's a reason they don't tell you what gradschool is really like in all those brochures. Adjectives like 'soul-destroying' don't sell well. Neither does 'Get paid a fraction of your worth and lose all motivation and self-esteem in the process! For 6 (hopefully 5.5) easy installments of one year of your youth, you too can perpetuate the feeling of despair to another generation of soon-to-be-former scientists!'

Maybe i should go into marketing. Or some 'truth in advertising' nonprofit. We'll have to work on reconciling that 'truth' business when i work for the gov't. I know, i'll invent a process that changes truth to truthiness. I'll be a thousandaire!


PS: Today is really June 22nd. Make believe it says that on the top.


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